Last night we continued our series on how the Lordship of Christ and the message of the Gospel affect all areas of our lives. Specifically, we continued the study from two weeks ago on relationships by looking at dating in light of the big truths that define the Christian life. The notes are a little sketchy in places, but here’s the gist, with the scriptures we covered:
The Big Ideas.
Everyone wants to just have their own opinions about dating. But, we are disciples of Jesus Christ. This means two things:
- We must bring our ideas about dating under the Lordship of Christ, by seeking to get our ideas about dating from God’s word, and by yielding to His Spirit in all our decisions.
- We must allow the Gospel to shape how we think about dating.
Matthew 28:18-20 lays both these ideas out for us.
An example of living this out: The Apostle Paul.
These passages in Paul’s letter to the Corinthian church weren’t written initially to apply to the modern concept of dating, but if we look at his thinking here–the way he works through issues, what motivates him–there’s lots for us to see for any area of life, especially one as central as our dating relationships.
1 Corinthians 7:1-9 – There’s a danger in all this Paul is warning about: sexual sin.
1 Corinthains 7:25-36 – Notice here, for all the details in this passage that need to be worked out, Pauls burden is to help us see that there are larger concerns in life than simply “wanting to get married”
1 Corinthians 6:12 → 9:19-27 → 10:31-33 – These sections give us a great picture of a life lived with the Gospel in the front of someone’s mind.
Some practical ways these big ideas can work out in our lives.
Let’s try to see how we might answer some common questions if our minds are shaped by these ideas:
1. Should I be “looking” for someone to date? How should I look? How aggressive should I be?
- Seek the Lord first. Seek His kingdom. (Mt 6:31-34)
- See who’s doing that with you.
- Practice an “active passivity” – Ruth, Boaz
i. Have your “eyes open” to what’s going on and who’s around
ii. As you pray, “leave doors open” for God to work.
iii. Act when it’s time.
2. What kind of a person should I look for?
- Someone whose character and life goals line up with what God’s doing in your life. (a yoke)
i. Someone who’ll help you pursue God and His plan for your life
ii. Someone who’ll be a teammate in pursuing God’s kingdom. - Someone you want to live in Christian marriage with (Eph 5:22-33, 1 Peter 3:1-7, 1 Cor 7:1-7)
- Someone you like, and who likes you.
3. What things should we do together?
- Things that help you actually get to know each other. (Serving, life experiences).
- Things that don’t lead to sin.
- Things that you enjoy.
- Things that glorify God. (1 Cor 10:31)
4. How should we express affection for each other?
- In ways that remember and honor God.
- In ways that show respect for each other as “brother/sister? And “son/daughter” of God.
- In ways that don’t lead to sin.
- In ways that don’t compromise your testimony.
5. How do I know if we should “move forward” to marriage?
- Prayer
- Honesty
- Circumstances
- Christian community
Ending Verse: Psalm 34:8-10 – Oh, taste and see that the Lord is Good; Blessed is the man who trusts in Him! Oh, fear the Lord, you His saints! There is no lack to those who fear him. The young lions lack and suffer hunger; But those who seek the Lord shall not lack any good thing.