Orientation and Change: Notes from Last Night

Recapping our study two weeks ago–Our Culture’s Current Idea of Orientation: How you are and feel in the deepest part of you. Things you like. Ways you think and feel. Things inside of you can’t change, or at least can’t easily change, even if you try hard. Probably a way you were born.

“Sexual orientation refers to an enduring pattern of emotional, romantic, and/or sexual attractions to men, women, or both sexes. Sexual orientation also refers to a person’s sense of identity based on those attractions, related behaviors, and membership in a community of others who share those attractions.” – www.apa.org

The Bible’s view of orientation: Our “hearts” are the center of who we are, and everything we do comes from what our hearts are.

Our Culture’s Current view of change: Inconsistent.

For homosexual orientation, the idea is that you can’t change. No matter what you do, you will always want to act out your sexual desires. And trying to suppress them is harmful. The only healthy, positive thing is to live them out. So…since you can’t change it, you shouldn’t try.

But for many other things, the idea in the culture is that you should suppress those desires, regardless of whether you can change them or not…and that it is unhealthy to pursue them. Think Alcoholism, Anger and Violence, Racism, Laziness, and in the realm of sexuality think desires for sexual expression with children, incestual desires, bestiality. And there’s other issues like oppressive sexual expression within relationships, adulterous desires, pornography use. Many people would probably say that you could even change some of these orientations.

(For instance, our culture thinks religious feelings can be changed. They would say those views are a choice, and should be chosen against if they contradict the sentiment of the culture.)

In other words, we as a culture have said that there or some inner desires that should not be suppressed, and some that should be suppressed. Some that should be freely expressed and lived out, and some that should not. The important thing for all of us to see here is that these are moral judgments.

Tonight’s Questions:

1. Who’s standard are we using? How do we know which inner desires are harmful to act out on, and which are healthy? How do we know which orientations society should work to restrict and suppress, and which we should affirm and protect? Where do we have the authority to restrict polygamy, or look down on pedophilia, and affirm homosexuality?
2. How do we know what kinds of change are possible for human beings? How do we know what options there are for lives lived against an orientation? (For example, what would we say to someone who had an orientation towards something we all affirmed should not be lived out?)

Answers:

1. Who’s standard are we using? Christians look to God’s word. Christians have a clear moral standard based on the word of the Creator. We have no other way to know, in a confusing world, what is right and wrong, what is healthy and unhealthy, and what should and should not be affirmed and lived out. We search the scriptures. We pray. We lean on the word of God to tell us his will for us. Without that, the only thing that will establish a moral standard is power. We will live under the dictatorship of human whims enforced by whatever group has the votes, and then whoever has the guns.

So we must see the options: Either the rule of God who is love, through his word, or the rule of the human heart.  See Mark 7:20-23. Jesus listed things that defile us. They are sin. They dishonor God. They hurt us. They are unhealthy. They lead to separation from God now and for eternity. We do not have the capacity, outside of God’s word, to know what those things are or are not.

2. How do we know what kinds of change are possible for human beings? We search God’s word to find out about change.

• In some senses, change is not possible for men and women, without God’s help. To get a sense for our predicament before we turn to God, see John 8:31-34 (we’re slaves to sin), Romans 3:10-19 (we’re guilty before God), Ephesians 2:1-3 (we’re under the sway of spiritual darkness), Jeremiah 17:9 (we have incurable hearts)
• So we may be tempted to say with the Israelites, “it is hopeless”(see Jeremiah 18:11-12). And without God, it may be. We may find in ourselves things which are defiling, which we constantly want to act out. We may choose to resist, but eventually lose the will to resist under the intense pressure of the desires. In other words, we may have the physical ability to resist, but we may lack the moral power. God calls this slavery to sin, or having an incurable heart. It creates guilt before him, since we choose to not resist the inner desires which we could physically resist.
• But Jeremiah 18:11 gives God’s plan… “Turn from your evil ways.” Or as Psalm 80:3 says it: “Turn us, and we shall be saved.” There is such a thing as humans turning to God. The bible calls this repentance. The key is this: If God says “Turn” then he will provide a way for us to turn. What God commands or invites us to, He provides the power to perform, if we’ll believe His word and decide to act on it in faith.
• See Acts 3:18-19.
• When we repent and are turned: Freedom from Slavery (John 8:32 & 36), Freedom from Guilt (Romans 3:21-26), Life out of death (Ephesians 2:4-11), Escape from the kingdom of darkness (Colossians 1:13), a new heart (Ezekiel 36:25-28) with God’s law on it (Jeremiah 31:33)
• In other words, in Christ we have a new identity (2 Corinthians 5:17).
• The new identity comes from a whole new birth. (John 3:3)
• This new birth involves a whole new life and power inside of us—God Himself (2 Peter 1:4). This is His Spirit, who brings a new set of desires and a new power to live without acting out of the old defiling desires. (Galatians 5:16-25)

Recap & Sum up:

1. We need to realize that everyone makes judgments about what orientations and desires should be acted upon, and which should be suppressed. Christians just say that God’s word is the only standard by which we can know what we need to turn from in order to turn to God.
2. Though we don’t have the moral strength to change ourselves, God invites us to turn to him and rely on his power.
3. If we repent (if we change our minds and decide to depend on his power to physically resist sin), He supplies Himself, in our hearts, with the power to live in ways that honor him and bless us.
4. We find a whole new life and identity in Christ that frees us from being defined by our old orientations.

A thought to lead into our time of worship: We’re free from guilt, free from old definitions, free from destructive patterns, free from narrow views of humanity, free from dead spiritual darkness, and one day we’ll be totally delivered from everything sin has done to us and the whole world—Romans 8:16-21